There are many different personalities in the world…and there are many times those different personalities clash. Have you ever worked with, lived with or were friends with someone you didn’t quite see eye to eye with? I have…and through all those times, I’ve learned how I am in those situations and I’ve tried & am still trying to act appropriately according to the situation.
I’ve learned that when someone bothers you, makes you upset or frustrated, that you need to remove yourself from that situation. Let yourself be mad. There’s no reason to keep everything bottled up…it will just end up exploding at the wrong time. That usually only makes the situation worse…and of course, it won’t really make you feel any better. When you remove yourself from the situation you allow yourself to cool off & have some time to reflect on what happened. Once you feel that you are no longer bothered by the situation, you can talk to or be around that person again.
Although stepping away from a situation is always helpful, you will need to address what bothers you at some point or another. If you do not talk about what has bothered you, it may continue happening and could potentially harm the relationship. If you feel too overwhelmed to talk with the person because you don’t know what to say… write it out first. You will notice in my posts that I recommend to write things out first and this is because this is something I’ve done throughout my life and I have found that it helps me sort my thoughts and prepare for what may be a difficult conversation.
Once you write out what you would like to say, read over it and see if there are any changes you could make. The first draft may be a bit mean..but that’s ok, because it’s better to get it out on paper than yelling at the person you will be talking to. After you feel that you are comfortable with what you want to say, approach the person and ask if you can talk. Pick a good time so that you both have time to hear each other out and say what you need to say. This way the problem can actually get resolved and you both can move forward with a healthy relationship.
If ever in doubt, talk things over with a friend or family member first, someone that’s not involved in the situation. Feel out their advice and what they have to say about it. If the issue is too personal to discuss, stick to the “writing it out” method. This will help you decide how it will be best to handle the situation. Regardless, it will be better once you address the issue, it is worth a shot at least!